Navigating the Holiday Season Whilst Chronically Ill

By a Harmless Team Member

For many of us, Christmas is a time for joy and celebration. Gift buying, gift giving, parties and everything in between. However, for those living with a chronic illness, it can sometimes be incredibly challenging.

The business and expectation of it all can lead to feelings of pressure or anxiety, resulting in stress and – as those who are chronically ill know all too well – a flare up. Fear of this happening could lead to missing out, despite best wishes or intentions. Here are some tips for finding that ever important balance during this period.

Set realistic expectations
With the hustle and bustle of Christmas, it is easy to fall into the trap of doing too much too soon or comparing your experiences to others. Take time to remind yourself of what your priorities are – decide in advance what you feel you can manage, whilst allowing yourself some space for change should this be needed. Your health is important!

Rest well and plan in advance
Whenever I think of busy periods such as Christmas, the spoon theory (developed by Christine Miserandino) comes to mind. It presents the idea that each person has a finite number of ‘spoons’ on any given day, and that certain activities can be more draining than others. For example, getting out of bed may take up 1 spoon but going out for a Christmas meal with family or friends may take up 3 spoons. The number of spoons we have each day will also change in response to external factors such as sleep or any ongoing stress. 

The theory serves as a reminder to only agree to things that you feel are manageable for you and to prioritise what is most meaningful. Think to yourself, do I have enough spoons for this? Will I have enough time to replenish my spoons before the next plan? If no, decline those invitations without guilt – knowing that you are doing what is best for your health and well-being.

Don’t be afraid to mix it up 
If traditional Christmas activities like cooking the turkey dinner or attending big parties are too much, consider replacing these with activities that cost less spoons. This could be a Christmas movie marathon, a night in with board games, arts and crafts or anything else that you feel you would be able to enjoy and make memories from.

This list is not exhaustive, but I hope what shines through is the importance of your health and wellbeing. By focussing on setting realistic goals, resting well and adjusting things when needed, you can enjoy a Christmas that doesn’t require you to sacrifice this.

On behalf of everyone at Harmless and The Tomorrow Project, I wish you a very happy and restful Christmas period – however you spend it.


For more information on the spoon theory and taking care of yourself during Christmas, follow the links below:
The Brain Charity
Burning Nights
Living With ME
ME/CFS and Fibromyalgia Self-Help