‘It’s Nearly Christmas and I Just Can’t Face It’

By Anna Scott (Clinical Support Worker)

Maybe you feel like you’re walking through treacle at the moment and things are looking bleak. The lead up to the Christmas period can bring about a sense of dread for so many of us who are struggling with our mental health or our circumstances. There are so many reasons why you might be feeling like your head is in a thick fog.

It might feel impossible to enjoy the festivities in the same way that everyone else seems to. Sometimes it is helpful to shift our expectations: your Christmas might look different to those of the people around you and that is absolutely fine. You are allowed to take care of yourself. You don’t have to be thriving this Christmas. Here are some ideas that might help you manage if you’re feeling low when the world around you looks so bright and sparkly…

Set yourself non-negotiables in advance. These are things that you will commit to doing every day. Some days these will feel really hard, some days they will be easy. Small wins are worth noticing. Set yourself goals that are reasonable, achievable and helpful. These will look different for everyone.

Examples might include:

• Being outside in daylight for at least 10 minutes every day. Once you are out, you might find that you want to stay out longer but if not, that’s OK.
   
• Moving your body for at least 10 minutes every day (if you are able). Maybe a walk round the block feels achievable or perhaps you have a yoga practice that helps. Whatever it is, commit to at least 10 minutes every day.
   
• Setting your waking and sleep times. Even if the days between Christmas and New Year feel like a timeless void, set yourself wake-up and bed times. Build steady features of your day across the holiday period. Our circadian rhythms are so pivotal to our mood. If you can apply simple elements of schedule in any way, your body will thank you for it.
   
• Changing your clothes by a certain time each day and getting ready for a new day. Stay comfy, stay cosy but change into fresh clothes.

Other helpful practices might include…

If you have the capacity, do something for someone else. Maybe you could visit an elderly neighbour, send a card to someone who is on their own, or volunteer at a local charity. Maybe you don’t feel you have the capacity or energy to do these things, but even the smallest act of service for someone else can boost your own mood and bring purpose to your day.

When there are moments that feel especially difficult, step away and ground yourself. You could find a breathing exercise on YouTube to slow your body and mind. You could journal to get your thoughts down on paper or take a cold shower.

Listen to music that comforts you. Be wary of the rabbit hole that sad music can bring. Which songs feel safe and warm and have the ability to lift your mood?

Limit exposure to triggers. Grant yourself the grace to step away from things that are especially hard (eg certain media channels, alcohol, events). Think wisely about what is and isn’t helpful for you to engage with. Perhaps make a plan beforehand about where you might start and stop. If this feels particularly hard, ask for help and support from others.

Have some time without technology. Leave your phone in another room and cook or craft or be outside. Live like a Victorian for an hour. 

Talk to someone. Throughout this period there is always someone ready to listen. Even when you feel completely alone, you can call for help. If there is someone in your life who you trust in the moment, take a bold step and reach out. You are more than worthy of support. You don’t have to get through this season on your own. There are also many helplines and messaging services (see below) ready to speak to you throughout this period. Keep them in your toolkit, just in case.

These ideas might help to moderate some of the lows, but things may still feel hard. This Christmas will be a wave to ride, not a permanent state. Thankfully, you do not need to conquer the whole season right now – just take it one moment at a time.

Helpful Resources for the Christmas Period
Samaritans 116 123
Mind 0300 102 1234
The Silver Line 0800 4 70 80 90
Childline 0800 1111
CALM 0800 58 58 58
BEAT 0808 801 0677