By Caroline Harroe (Harmless CEO)
As a therapist working in suicide prevention, I’ve witnessed a worrying trend: the rise of loneliness. At Harmless, our ultimate goal is to become unnecessary, but the reality is that our services are needed now more than ever. Referrals have skyrocketed by 215% since 2020, and with suicide rates in England increasing, we need to find ways to support each other better.
The Loneliness Epidemic
Statistics paint a stark picture: In 2022, 3.7 million adults in England reported feeling lonely ‘often’ or ‘always’. Loneliness is associated with increased risk of depression, anxiety, and suicide. 1 in 5 adults experience suicidal thoughts in their lifetime, and suicide is the leading cause of death for people aged 5 – 34 in England and Wales. And the rate is rising.
Therapy’s Limitations
While therapy is undoubtedly valuable, it’s not a panacea for loneliness. In some ways, it can even contribute to the problem. I’ve often heard people say they should discuss their problems with their therapist instead of friends or family, or even friends saying, ‘I’m not your therapist’. This separation of therapeutic support from everyday relationships can inadvertently reinforce feelings of isolation.
Therapy is a fantastic resource, offering professional guidance and support for personal growth. But it cannot replace the intimacy and connection of authentic human relationships. We need a world with better mental health, not just more therapy.
The Power of Connection
We need to rediscover the power of opening up to someone we trust and being present for someone who trusts us. Consider the qualities of a good therapist: active listening, non-judgment, empathy, and sensitivity. These are qualities we can all cultivate in our relationships with friends, family, and community members.
Similarly, the qualities of someone who benefits from therapy – self-awareness, authenticity, vulnerability, and openness to discomfort and new perspectives – are valuable assets in all areas of life.
Rediscovering the Art of Conversation
We once had elders, priests, and even hairdressers who played the role of listeners and confidants. We need to revive this tradition of sharing our vulnerabilities and supporting each other through life’s challenges.
While therapy has its place, it’s crucial to remember the importance of intimate conversations with those who truly know us. Let’s take the time to listen to each other, share our vulnerabilities, and build stronger connections, while also recognising the importance of seeking professional help when needed.
Normalising Everyday Emotions
The Anna Freud National Centre for Children and Families recently demonstrated that normalising everyday emotional experiences is a promising intervention for young people. By improving emotional literacy and avoiding the pathologising of emotions, we equip young people with the skills to navigate their mental health. This approach aligns with the broader need to foster connection and open communication to combat loneliness and promote mental wellbeing.
Turning the Tide on Loneliness
Ultimately, creating a society that truly supports mental health requires change at a fundamental level. We can all contribute to this change by fostering genuine connections, practicing empathy, and normalising open conversations about our emotional experiences. Let’s turn the tide on loneliness together, while continuing to seek and offer support when professional help is needed.
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Notes
The literature on loneliness and mental health reveals a complex interplay between these factors, with loneliness significantly impacting various mental health phenomena. Loneliness, characterised by a perceived lack of social connection and belonging, has been identified as a major risk factor for a range of mental health difficulties, including anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation.
Loneliness and Anxiety
Studies have shown a strong correlation between loneliness and anxiety. Loneliness can exacerbate anxiety symptoms, leading to a vicious cycle where social withdrawal and isolation further increase anxiety levels. This relationship is particularly concerning given the high prevalence of both loneliness and anxiety in modern society.
Loneliness and Depression
Loneliness is also a significant risk factor for depression. The lack of social support and connection associated with loneliness can contribute to feelings of hopelessness, low self-esteem, and negative thoughts, which are hallmarks of depression.
Loneliness and Suicide
The link between loneliness and suicide is well-established in the literature. Loneliness can increase the risk of suicidal ideation and behaviour, particularly in individuals already struggling with mental health conditions.
Impact on Other Mental Health Phenomena
Loneliness can also impact other mental health phenomena, including:
- Stress: Loneliness can increase stress levels and impair coping mechanisms, making individuals more vulnerable to the negative effects of stress.
- Sleep: Loneliness has been linked to sleep disturbances, including difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, and experiencing restful sleep.
- Cognitive Function: Loneliness can negatively affect cognitive function, including memory, attention, and decision-making abilities.
- Physical Health: Loneliness has also been associated with an increased risk of physical health problems, such as cardiovascular disease and weakened immune function.
Conclusion
The literature highlights the significant impact of loneliness on mental health, particularly its role in exacerbating anxiety, depression, and suicide risk. Addressing loneliness is crucial for promoting mental wellbeing and preventing mental health difficulties. Interventions that focus on building social connections, enhancing interpersonal skills, and fostering a sense of belonging are essential for combating loneliness and its detrimental effects on mental health.
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