By Caroline Harroe (CEO)
For those of us born in the 70s, watching Stranger Things isn’t just a trip down memory lane filled with bike rides and late summer nights with friends without phones. It is a visceral encounter with a world we remember all too well – a world that, for many of us, felt like living in the ‘Upside Down’ while pretending to be in the light.
When we watch the show today, we see a group of misfits fighting monsters. But for a gay woman growing up in the 80s and 90s, the ‘monster’ wasn’t a Demogorgon. It was the silence. It was the absolute, crushing lack of a ‘peg upon which to hang’ our identities.
The Era of the Straight Performance
In the 80s, there were no everyday storylines on TV that looked like us. There were no role models. Instead, there was a relentless stream of propaganda. We grew up watching the news frame HIV as a ‘gay man’s disease’, a moral judgment masquerading as a medical crisis. For many of us, the stakes weren’t just social awkwardness – they were existential. To be anything other than straight was to risk your home, your family, and your safety. I remember the foolish bravery of coming out at eleven years old, only to have that spark extinguished by mockery and ridicule. I learned the lesson the world wanted me to learn: Conform. Behave. Be little. I traded my reality for a ‘straight performance’, a survival tactic that meant my identity was no longer my own.
The Scene That Echoed
There is a specific resonance in Stranger Things that only hits if you are of a certain age. It’s the quiet, heavy acknowledgment that owning your reality in the 80s could mean losing everything. The show treats this not as a plot device, but as a respectful reference to a time of genuine fear. It captures that ‘fine sense of fear’ that followed us through school hallways and family dinners – a fear without a name, but with very real consequences.
A New Language of Freedom
The contrast between then and now is perhaps most visible in the casual conversations of our children. Recently, I heard my 14-year-old ask a friend about an upcoming date. His first question wasn’t a judgment; it was a simple, weightless enquiry: ‘Is it with a guy or a girl?’ There was no agenda. No burden. Just a simple acknowledgement of possibility. In that moment, the distance we have travelled felt monumental. We have moved forward, carving out spaces where our children don’t have to carry the ‘Upside Down’ inside them.
The Echoes of the Past
However, we cannot afford to be complacent. While the 14-year-olds of today might breathe easier, the vitriol and propaganda of the pre-2000s are being recycled. We see it in the politically orchestrated uprising of transphobia and the reality that, in many parts of the world, it is still not safe to simply be. The monsters have changed their names, but their tactics – fear, isolation, and the demand for conformity – remain the same.
Why We Must Remember
We use popular culture like Stranger Things not just to reminisce, but to learn, reflect, and consider.
- Reflect on the strength it took to survive a decade that tried to erase you.
- Learn from the ‘everydayness’ that brings beauty to our lives now – the quiet reclaimed moments of being our authentic selves.
- Consider how we can protect the next generation from the shadows we once lived in.
Nostalgia is sweet, but truth is stronger. Let’s keep moving toward the light, ensuring that ‘being invisible’ is never again a requirement for survival.
